Family Advocacy honors the nonviolent lifestyle Published Jan. 17, 2007 By Sheri Ward Family Advocacy TYNDALL AIR FORCE BASE, Fla. -- When each of us renews our daily commitment to resolving conflicts nonviolently, we honor Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.'s legacy. Each January, we celebrate the birthday of this civil rights leader who believed strongly in nonviolence. Dr. King sponsored workshops to train workers in nonviolent behavior. His workers felt proud that they could contain their violence and learn not to hate their enemies. This increased their sense of purpose. Dr. King understood better than most people that violence only begets more violence. He believed that, "The surest way to be happy is to seek happiness for others." He taught that nonviolence is the best approach to resolving conflict. The more we learn how to communicate effectively the less frustrated and stressed we become. Family Advocacy has three suggestions on how people can use this approach to resolving conflicts. First, avoid fights and physically attacking others. Violence is an unacceptable outlet for anger. In addition to helping ourselves, help children avoid violence by acknowledging their anger and help them cope in other ways. Phrases like, "I know you're angry, but you can't hit or hurt someone," are helpful teaching moments. Establish cooperative ways of interacting will help eliminate the use of violence in our families. Children learn methods of resolving differences by how we manage conflict within our family. Second, manage the intense anger that can lead to physical violence and to listen to your child's or partner's point of view. Count to ten, take a deep breath or find other ways to calm down. Eventually, we will respect others' opinions, even if we disagree. We'll search for solutions to the conflict together. In doing so, we model basic skills for resolving conflict. Last, support conflict resolution and violence prevention programs in our schools and communities. Find out if there are available programs that teach conflict resolution. Good resources can be found in schools, religious communities and here on base. Together we can take Dr. King's dream and make it a reality.